i now know the meaning of 'keep your friends close but enemies closer.'
no matter how good of a person you are or how kind of a heart you have there are always gonna be people who try to break you down and get the best of you.
i put my trust in somebody and told them things with complete honesty and faith that my feelings and thoughts were safe with them...........after hearing 'you can trust me'....'whatever you tell me stays with me'........and 'i won't think of you different' from someone you think you can trust that person. well, i did and i let my guard down. and this is the exact reason why i do not trust people easily and why i'm so bitter towards relationships and love.
this person used my words against me. and i almost lost a very very meaningful and dear friendship because somebody couldn't keep their mouth closed.
long story short.........i'm a stronger person than what i let on to be. there's a fucking brick wall surrounded by steel bars around my heart and nobody will break me down that easily. nobody thought i had the balls to ask about the truth but i did, and i asked. and i finally know what all the bullshit and drama was about.
it's very very hard to explain but my feelings and my heart were on the line and so were somebody else's and these shit talkers had no concern for what they were doing to US.
i'm over it now.......but in the things i see and in my heart i know the truth. God is with me. i asked Him for guidance and help towards the truth and now i know. God is good.
people need to give me more credit. for real.
